i was a gangster

I was a gangster

I was a gangster living in one room

With walls that engulfed me
Sounds of silence eating me up
Far from the world with no sunshine
All I could feel was warmth
Warmth of my blood flowing down my body
Scratching, trying to find a way out
The pain that showed me no mercy
Did it matter, was it worth it?
I don’t know
Consumed by darkness
I wanted to keep strong
Keep my cool

I was a gangster

Self-acclaimed
I never knew what was required
I never saw what was showed
I just wanted to be seen
These walls were holding me back
Losing my nails by the day
The eagerness to escape this one room
To explore and live up to my name
Sadly the world was not looking for me
I’ve been in so deep, even an escape will not free me

I was a gangster just writing on walls

Trying to be cool, fit it
With that, I forgot to stand out
I knew every inch of that room
While trying to find myself
It was hard to bare
The heavy heart was burning me
My body was shaking because my mind was lost
I was a gangster and confined to one room

It was not my destiny

But it became my path
No light at the end of the tunnel
As all this darkness is all I had
Hope had no room
Faith lifted me only for reality to slap me down

I was a gangster living in one room

Trying to find my way out
Trying to set my soul free
Banging on walls to keep myself sane
Stumping on the ground to shake my purpose
This room was torture
This room was a lesson
Never again, I said.

Being a gangster was not worth being trapped in my own mind

Mental slavery
As I set my mind free
I’m not a gangster anymore
My body is free
My mind is clear
I left that room and started living
Broke down those walls and started thinking

I was a gangster to my own mind

I was a gangster and never again...