The Need

The need

 

He sat there gazing

His heart was empty
His mind was playing tricks on him
He looked dead
One could see through the hurt
The hunger for better
The void that needed to be filled with meaning

He has a need to speak

The need to explode and define
He felt like running away
But the walls were too close for that to happen
He fought in a cold war
Where white flags did not exist
The need to get out of the war
Let it be known that people can see

His mind still didn’t let him be

While his heart was pounding against his chest
The need he had, had him bruising
This hurt could not be defined
He’s the only one that could feel this

Words failed him

Actions exposed him
He is left mentally naked
As he wonders off between the pain and the need
What could set him free?

The power he thought he had vanished

Look at him
Look at how hollow he seems
The hurt has ripped him apart
Anyone can see through him
Though he tries to keep it together
The weight is more than he can handle

He is not a runner

Though he is short tempered
He still decided to sit there and gaze
The war is far from over
But he has no ammunition left to stand firm
The need is too much to bare
His feet are cold
But his body is burning with the desire to stand up
This is sad
Sad from close and even far

The need the man has is not written on the walls

There is no manual he could read
There is just blankness
There is no light
There is no hope
In his eyes all he could see is defeat

He tried to stay strong

But the world he’s in is not fair
They say time tells while it heals
Well he has non in sight
The need has left him not believing in a lot
The blood flowing inside him is not the same

A cold war is fought in vain

The pain is too much for him
Look at him
Look at how he is seeking for that need

The need to smile

The need to be excited
The need to see the world he chose in a different light
The harder the thought
The harder the reality

The need

The need

What does love do?

What does love do?

What does love do?

When the heart is no more
When the mind doesn’t see the same
When time changed internals
When it showed you what you never thought you would see

What does love do?

When the time is over
When you never want to admit
The pain will not change
When thoughts of excitement are tales
When happiness is nowhere
When steps you take forward are pointless

What does love do?

When the pillow you adored becomes your nightmare
When the warmth becomes cold
When mirrors even fear looking at you
When walls could just crash you for fun
When nothing seems to make sense

What does love do?

When the bed is suddenly bigger than you know it
When every song hits your heart
When the love of loving vanishes
When there are no words to describe
When days just come and go
When the need to smile has you hanging

What does love do?

When tears will not save you, so they pointless
When headaches become norms
When spoken words pierce the heart sharp
When the truth is denied
When reflections do not look the same
When every room feels like a cell

What does love do?

 

Believe

in the mist of it all
in the deepness of that fall
the width it sprung
the thoughts it shows
the distance don't matter
the finish line is clear

sulk deep
breathe harder and see
hope and believe
the light will shine
and all will be fine

the concept of holding on
scratching your head
pulling your hair
you trust and think hard
even words don't matter
the puzzle not matching
the pieces deep inside shatter

want to fly away
past the sadness
of the choice we made
one way or the other
we will find a way
internal battles surfaces
it's a way not found
take a look at all these faces

beat, beat
punches hard
feel, feel
tears you apart
mute.....

the mist will be clear
that light will shine
that wall will brake
and that water will flow
it's in all that fear
that we seek the utmost power
believe so we say...

this wall

 

the writing on the wall

the ink is faint

wall not straight

letters falling apart

sentences not making sense

 

bet you I wrote in tears

missing so many words

it's dark

and yet I write

the wall is slippery

I need a cloth

 

I can't even find the door

I'm on my knees

the question marks

the light I need

 

I can't keep writing in the dark

I can feel the ink in my eyes

eye balls black

retina lost it's colour

this is a puzzle

Botshelo should finish this off

 

I'm tired

I'm restless

 

maybe I should move one brick

maybe I should add

this wall is my protector

this wall I need

bang, bang

need to feed

 

give meaning

the dark will fade

the wall will still stand

writing I keep at it

i'm tired

 

my heart is heavy

mix ink with tears

walls with the dark

brake you.

 

3am

as dark as it is
as hollow as it feels
the weight is on the arm
the heart is too heavy

I ran in the dark
I hit walls
rolled on the floor
kicked the door
and the sponge of the bed let me

I have pins cutting
knifes are weak
soul burning
fire is cold
tears fell
eyes swollen
words skipped
while the heart ripped

in need of some rain
the drought is ought
stomach shrinking
the floor is picking
legs floating
and I'm drowning

the dark speaks
it speaks and I'm listening

SCREAM

words will eat you
words will make you forget the point
words will make you just wanna......!!!!!

the feeling inside is powerful
the depth of it all is heavy
deep inside your being will lie a room
a room full of words
words that cannot be articulated normally
they engulf you so strong
but one day, the beast must leave
one day one needs to let loose

let the words speak
let the scream be felt
let those words live
unleash your inner most power
and just let loose.

words will kill you inside
the feeling of knowing what you want to share
the feeling of wanting to slap a soul
the beast will grow
like an atomic bomb, it will form
and one of the good days
it will all be seen and even felt

let it go
let it be

SCREAM
so loud that you brake walls
so powerful that you leave yourself blank
these words will not matter after
only to the receiver will they squander
these words
these words

stop accumulating words
use them
that's my 2c and change.

Between

Between.

We look clear
we look hard
we seek
even though we don't find.

the spaces are measured
the distance is unjust
though it leads nowhere
all should be captured.

we look for a way
we look for light
we go up
and descent down.

every molecule works hard
not to think
but to analyse
we take steps forward
and question the past

between everything, we still lust.

Thoughts

THOUGHTS.

It's with everything in me that I get to think of this. It's been a minute.
When you realise that you have more people who love you and yet you still find an ignorant bone in you.

These thoughts are burning me inside.
But these thoughts are making me smile.
These people I keep seeing and having around me, surely do mean a lot to me.
Be it love or ride or die type thing.

Thoughts that need no caption,
Thoughts that are shared as equal.
My friends (as small as my circle may be), my family and everyone else that have no title but still bring change and meaning to my life.

The other day I saw peace, I felt peace and wish it lasted.
My thoughts still bring joy, though some times they deep in a cave.
Some times I even search for a mental way out.

My thoughts, these thoughts.
Do they matter, always.
Should we follow them, well find them.