I fucked up

Yeah I did, very bad

Fell into a pit of the unknown
I got burned by fires that had no origin
I did that with shame and disgrace
I hurt the hurt that came back to hurt me

The need to breathe through
The nerve of wanting to survive
I was swallowed by undescribed events
Events of sorry and stupidity
Woke up with a pain on the side of my soul

As I search for a lane to run on
The reality that spoke to me in tongues
The clarity that rose from bleeding eyes
The beat that was shared as tears filled my palms
While at it, I saw an empty future
The reason to stop breathing
No joy was seen nor felt
I would run through archives of mislead words
Words that needed proper grounds to stand on
Shit I fucked up…!!!

Even my hands would not dig out this grave

Selfish thoughts that had me not brave
Pause, slow down, I need to save
Save the little space left in my soul
Just to redeem myself
This was not the aim, yes I said it.

I went to bed in an empty room
A room full of echoes that lead to banging walls
Shaking floors and a not so secure structure
This was to redefine self-hate
A bag full of regret dragged in a slow pace

I fucked up and saw today shatter between the pages of my life

No hard copy was available
There was nothing hard about my actions
Laser beam eyes that saw through time
From the sad present to the beginning of it all
I never felt a smile, just ripped apart from where I stood
Yes I said it…

I FUCKED UP!!!